10/Sep/2009 - A Blessing in Disguise

Well, I just taken my 2nd chemo last Thu, and I still not really fully recovered yet, due to my little experiment of starving the cancer.

While walking back from the train station, I notice that 1 of my car tire and its rim is stolen. Gosh! I m dead tired and now... I have think of 3 options

1) There is a same car nearby. People steal from me, I steal from other people (this is a BAD thought, never try this EVER!!)
2) Call my mechanic ask for help
3) Call my dad, leave the car there.

In less than 30 seconds, I make up my mind. I m weak (mentally and physically), I m using cancer and chemo as excuse for me NOT to replace it with spare tire.

I roll up my sleeve, and start to jack the car bit by bit. Chemo make my knee really weak, I need to stand up again and again for a relief. Jack the car slowly like tortoise, bit by bit really slow.

Soon the jacking is done, and I replace the tire and release the jack.

At first it is really torturing, but as when I keep on jacking and jacking I have forgotten the pain and tiredness (yeah having fun jacking here). First step is always the hardest, but when you keep on moving and forget the pains, you will find some joy along the way.

I m happy today, a thief had taught me a most valuable lesson in my life. don't let cancer be excuse for me for NOT doing anything. Same to you out there, when you have problem, solve it slowly, soon you will find the solution (joy).

Chris Gardner (or Will Smith) used to say this before:

Christopher Gardner: Hey. Don't ever let somebody tell you... You can't do something. Not even me. All right?
Christopher: All right.
Christopher Gardner: You got a dream... You gotta protect it. People can't do somethin' themselves, they wanna tell you you can't do it. If you want somethin', go get it. Period.

Finally.. God please bless the thief, thing happen for a reason. I hope he don't spend the money on drug for stealing from a cancer patient.

04/Sep/2009 - Days after my 2nd chemo

When I see my doc for my 2nd chemo, he asked how am I doing. I told him I m good, very good, as I don't feel so tired and have a good appetite. Doc say it is because of the steroid he given to me (Dexalone). 2 tablets for 3 times a day - it can make u feel like superman! Gosh.. my confidence got shaken instantly.. I feel energetic because of the steroid?? Doc asked me to cut down to 1 tablet for 3 times a day. I feel the impact on my body.

Btw after the doc do some basic checkup on me, he say my condition is good, and this is the first time I see smile on his face.

Yesterday after my 2nd chemo, my mom boiled the lotus root soup again
I have 2 piece of big pork lunch and another 2 piece of pork for dinner

My "experiment" seem working, as I don't feel so tired today.

03/Sep- Don't feel tired. Have 2 piece of big pork lunch and another 2 piece of pork for dinner
04/Sep- Try to cut down meat consumption. Have 1 piece of big pork lunch and another 1 piece of pork for dinner
05/Sep- Try on new experiment. Little bit of pork for lunch. My body was shaking whole day long. I sleep 3 times during day time, really exhausted. I consume back 2 pieces meat for my dinner
06/Sep- My last day to restore all my energy before start to work tomorrow.
07/Sep- I started to reduce my meat consumption from today onward. I took little bit of chili padi during lunch. Nose bleeding a bit at 4pm
08/Sep- I took little bit curry during lunch. Nose full of mucus
09/Sep- Take normal lunch, no more chili or curry. Nose still full of mucus
10/Sep- Take normal lunch, no more chili or curry. Nose bleed a bit.

What am I doin here, having so much fun with cancer...
Actually I wanna know what diet does the cancer like, what what it doesn't
When my nose full of mucus, this mean cancer is hungry, it attack my sinus to create mucus (food for cancer). As when I start to starve myself with lesser meat, I lost energy, cancer also lost energy and started to have a lot of mucus. So I will just have to clear off the mucus regularly.

Know your enemy well, to win the battle. I m starving together with my cancer now, good time for Chemo to do their job. Hope I don't get into wrong strategy and get myself killed! I will keep on doing experiment on myself. Its fun to fool around with my cancer.

02/Sep/2009 - The day being Bald, Bold and Stupid!

Well after being bald since 27/Aug/2009, I still shamelessly (well nothing to be shame of) go out to meet my friends

28/Aug/2009 (Fri) - Went to Genting Casino for the first time in my life
29/Aug/2009 (Sat) - Meeting friend for afternoon session and night session
30/Aug/2009 (Sun) - Meeting friend for morning session
31/Aug/2009 (Mon) - Meeting friend for night session

I m flat and exhausted... I just realized that its stupid to rush and meet so many people before my 2nd chemo. I used a wrong strategy in this battle, because I m too over confident in this (someone slap me please!!!). I promised myself I will play this cancer games right and smart, as my life is my bet.

Now I m worried if I m in good condition for tomorrow chemo
Just finished watching "The bucket list", now planning for my own Bucket List

Good stuff I learned from The Bucket List
1) Have you found joy in your life?
- Nope, I always tend to find more & more joy. Joy never be enough
2) Has your life brought joy to others?
- Yeah, ask my friends :-)